Friday, November 23, 2012


I was reading another Novel of Paulo Caelho - "The Zahir". I can relate to his writings so much; but today while reading i was trying to catch my own thoughts as i was reading. Yes there are a few points when my mind stops understanding and relating, but i do not find myself able to identify what is it that i believe if i do not take what i am reading.
Sometimes as if i get caught in my own thoughts and as much i want to simplify the things for myself i actually end up complicating them. There are so many confusions rather should i say i find myself in a constant state of confusion.
 To put forward an example of this confusion let me explain by taking the subject of love say.
 I often dream about being with the right person who would probly change my life and our love will be nothing less than what they call platonic love. Somewhere i  feel i can't settle for anything less than that. But if you ask me what do u mean by "the right person" or "platonic love" i have no clue.
Even i have known myself thinking several times about the futility of love and about whether there ever can be a thing like love.
And even some other times I have seen myself as simply believing in flirting with no strings attached.
 I have thought at times that love is a mere illusion and not quite a reality
 I have thought of it as the most selfish thing on earth which everybody tags as selfless.

Yes we do say "luv u" to so many people around us , to friends, to our family. Even i do. But i have even known myself thinking over it as to what do i actually mean when i say "luv u" to these people. I have wondered sometimes  why is it that i am saying these words when i dont even know what it is to love!! And yet sometimes just because these are the appropriate words to say, or may be to reciprocate, or may be that is what comes to my mind at that particular moment. But honestly i do not still understand what is it that is called love. But since i know i have been programmed to act like this, to say the appropriate words at the appropriate moment, to show particular emotions at particular time, so i act in that programmed manner all the time without faltering.

I find myself standing in the mid of a desert where all directions are looking similar and i dont know which one is to be taken. I pretend as if i know, as if i know more than everyone, but i know that I am lost, terribly lost. I have no clue about anything. My heart believes in signs, in destiny, My heart has faith but my mind constantly questions it of its chosen course and of the meaning of faith. I have no clue of what is right, and what is wrong. It is as if my mind has got formatted or the years of loading  from different sources has corrupted it. I have no concrete answer to anything and my mind is full of questions. There is a constant fracas between mind and heart. But i dont know what is it about the heart that still manages to convince the mind to wait. To wait and watch till it can see the faith speak for itself. ................................

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

sayings from The Warrior of light

Recently I read Paulo Coelho's MANUAL OF THE WARRIOR OF LIGHT. I liked it too much. I could relate to the words so much and somehow it felt like these are the words i needed at the moment. I am sharing a few of them here:
  • The Warrior knows that he is free to choose his desires, and he makes these decisions with courage, detachment, and sometimes- with a touch of madness.
  •  He opens his heart to the universe and asks god to give him the inspiration he needs to turn every blow from his enemy into a lesson in self defence.
  • A warrior of light knows what he wants. And he has no need to waste time on explanations.
  • A warrior of light knows certain moments repeat themselves. He often finds himself faced by the same problems and situations, and seeing these difficult situations return , he grows depressed, thinking that he is incapable of making any progress in life."I have been through all this before", he says to his heart. "Yes, you have been through all this before", replies his heart,"but you have not been beyond it". Then the warrior realises that these repeated experiences have but one aim : to teach him what he does not want to learn.
  • When the warrior of light feels that the moment has arrived, he drops everything and goes off on some long-dreamed-of adventure. When he realises that he can do no more, he abandons the fight, but never blames himself for having committed a few unexpected acts of folly.He does not spend his days trying to play the role others have chosen for him.
  • The warriors of light have a certain gleem in their eyes. They are of this world, they are part of the lives of other people and they set out on their journey with no saddlebags and no sandals. They are often cowardly. They do not always make the right decisions. They suffer over the most trivial things, they have mean thoughts and sometimes they are incapable of growing. They frequently deem themselves unworthy of any blessing or miracle. They are not quite sure what they are doing here. They spend many sleepless nights believing that their lives have no meaning. That is why they are warriors of light. Because they make mistakes. Because they ask themselves questions. Because they are looking for a reason- and are sure to find it.
  • Although i have been through all that i have, i do not regret the many hardships i met, because it was they who brought me to the place i wished to reach. Now all i have is this sword and i give it to whomever wishes to continue this pilgrimage. I carry with me the marks and scars of battles- they are the witnesses of what i sufferred and the rewards of what i conquered.
  • On some nights, he has nowhere to sleep, on others, he suffers from insomnia. That's just how it is, thinks the warrior."I was the one who chose to walk this path." In these words lies all his powers: He chose the path along which he is walking and so has no complaints.
  • In order to have faith in his own path, he does not need to prove that someone else's path is wrong.
  • He tries to establish what he can truly rely on. And he always checks that he carries three things with him: Faith, Hope, And love.
  • The warrior of light knows that no one is stupid and that life teaches evryone- however long that may take.
  • While he meditates, the warrior is not himself, but a spark from the soul of the world. These are the moments that give him an understanding of his responsibilities and of how he should behave accordingly. A warrior of light knows that in the silence of his heart he will hear an order that will guide him.
  • When a warrior of light is the victim of some injustice, he usually tries to be alone, in order not to show his pain to others.
  • He has learnt from the archer that, in order to shoot his arrow any distance, he must hold the bow taut. He has learned from the stars that only an inner explosion allows them to shine. The warrior notices that when a horse is about to jump over a fence, it tenses all its muscles.
  • The warriors of light sometimes behaves like water, flowing around the obstacles he encounters. Therein lies the strength of water: it cannot be shattered by a hammer or wounded by a knife,The strangest sword in the world can not scar its surface. The waters of a river adapt themselves to whatever route proves possible, but the river nevr forgets its one objective: the sea. So fragile at its source, it gathers the strength of other rivers it encounters.And after a certain point, its power is absolute.
  • The warrior of light does not always have the faith. There are moments when he believes in absolutely nothing, and he asks his heart: "is all this effort worth it?" But his heart remains silent. And the warrior has to decide for himself. Then he looks for an example. And he remembers that Jesus went through something similar in order fully to inhabit the human condition."Take away this cup from me", said Jesus. He too lost heart and courage, but he did not stop. The warrior continues despite his lack of faith. He goes forward and in the end, Faith returns.
  • When he makes that decision, he hears four comments: 'You always do the wrong thing. You are too old to change. You are no good. You dont deserve it." he looks up at the sky. ANd a voice says: "My dear,everybody makes mistakes. You are forgiven, but i can not force that forgiveness on you. Its your choice" The true warrior accepts that forgiveness.
  • One day, for no apparent reasons, the warrior realises that he does not feel the same enthusiasm for the light that he used to. At such time he has only one choice : to continue fighting the good fight. He says his prayers out of duty or fear or whatever, but he does not abandon the path. He perseveres and believes the angel would soon return and the merest flutter of his wings will soon restore the warriors joy to him.
  • When the master sees that the warrior is depressed he says: "you are not what you seem to be in these moments of sadness. You are better than that." Many have left - for reasons we will never understand- but you are still here. Why did god carry off all those amazing people and leave you?" "By now, millions of people will have given up. They dont get angry, They dont weep, They dont do anything, They merely wait for time to pass, They have lost the ability to react. You, however, are sad, That proves that your soul is still alive"
  • The warrior of light goes to his sacred place and puts on the indestrucible cloak of faith. Faith parries all blows. Faith transforms poison into crystal clear water.
  • A warrior knows that an angel and a devil are both competing for his sword hand. The devil says:"You will weaken. You will not know exactly when. You are afraid" The angel says: "You will weaken. You will not know exactly when. You are afraid." The warrior is surprised. Both said the same thing. Then the devil says"let me help you" And the angel says,"I will hel you" At that moment the warrior understands the difference. The Words may be the same, but these two are completely different. And he choses the angel's hand.


Sunday, September 9, 2012

A night's Dream

In the vastness of ocean, she did not jump in by choice,rather was forced to dive...
swimming across with closed eyes, and no desire of catching some pleasant sites...
Little did she know whether was it a dream or a reality when she got caught in a strange place,
with vertical walls all around, as if the ocean suddenly shrunk down to a deep narrow cavity,
trying to stretch a little, she found that she could not move, she could only go down, deep down into the cavity.Moving down was not her choice, the flow of the water was forcing her down. She closed her eyes, without resisting, she gave in to the abyss.

After an endless wait, the cavity ended and she found the ocean again.She welcomed that sight and this time not with the closed eyes.The ocean welcomed her too offering an absolute bliss that had been so difficult for her to find.

and suddenly she opened her eyes....
It was a strange dream.

Monday, April 16, 2012

of I and I alone

The thoughts are wandering far in the ocean rising and falling with the waves in pursuit of frequency with which to resonate…

They say its impossible to get the patterns out of chaos,
 yet the mind keeps on discerning in a hope to discover ,
with alter ego warning constantly that the chaos is intentional, deliberately raised for the sake of swollen ego…

The resurrection of wholesome is not possible out of what is nothing but smithereens of a fragmented intellect…

For the sake of I only, I had lived, But this I only got lost somewhere in the process
 or rather should I say
 now only It dawned upon I that I never was Found. 
No more I seems a reality. And I questions itself of its existence.
I has lost the sense of being,
yet the I exists.
The material manifestation of I remains.
I is much more than just the material manifestation of I or is this notion alone a trap culminating into a never ending chain of illusions?

The thoughts seeking a refuge from the whirls in the sea, groping to find a single piece of ground to which to stick…

The boundaries of tangible and intangible are diluting calling for the rational faculties to shift from the empty hypothesis to an established fact.

It may lead to transcendence of thoughts, of dreams, of realities, of values, of perceptions, of self,
nevertheless journey will continue to reach the ultimate end because that alone is the reason, that alone is the destiny. 

Monday, March 19, 2012

QVENDO!! (the winning gift)

Helo Everyone,

If you think Qvendo Fever is over, it’s actually not. To tell you all, I just received my Qvendo winning Gift. 

QVENDO Blogging contest was organized by indiblogger some time back. Where they asked us to make a wish list of things that we would love to shop from Qvendo.
 And on winning the contest we actually get those things for free. Luckily I won the contest and I am so excited to tell you that I recently got all the things I ordered.

And I must say I just loved it. Authentic Brands with superfine quality.
 In my shopping list I ordered almost all watches and clutches because whenever I have shopped online I have had problems with sizes almost always. But the one flip flop dress I ordered fits so perfectly that now while ordering from this site , I will never have any apprehensions. Their SIZE CHART ASSISANT is just fantabulous .Any ways just have a look at the things that I had ordered from them. You can take my word on how fabulous is to get the best brands at your door and that too for free!!
I already gifted most of the things that I received. I love gifting stuff to people. Qvendo made me really happy. You try QVENDO and you sure will fall in love with it. For me I Already am in love with it !!!!!
To Explore Qvendo, Go to
Enjoy ... happy blogging as well as shopping :) 

Friday, January 20, 2012

of An odd pursuit

I do not know where do i start, I want my opening line to be....
" It is really an impossible task to understand self fully"....
And yes of-course this is what i want my opening line to be and not what it should be.
But the very next moment i am compelled to think again and reflect on the reality of the above said and this time i want to make a different statement.
"It is a really hard or may be an impossible task to know the self completely if you are not equipped with the instrument of truth, if you refuse to face and confront even a single minutest detail about yourself ,be it an obscene one or a good one."
But again i am not sure of this statement either.
Then again i flounder a bit and want to change my statement ..
"Sometimes we may be confronting and upfront about all that exists within us. But there is a chance of not having full knowledge. There is a chance of misplaced foundations which served as a ground to our whole idea of self. If the underlying assumptions which were considered as absolutes are not actually absolutes, of which there is a fair chance, then the model of self derived from the erroneous assumptions will definitely fall flat.Such knowledge therefore will not reveal to us the nature of self completely because the erroneous assumptions cant facilitate it against all twists and all odds."
So I am forced to think again and this thought just presses itself upon me "How can we build castles in the air? How can we know self absolutely and completely without knowing The Absolutes? Without knowing the standards on which we have to rate ourselves, how can we rate ourselves?
All in all i end up with one fact that i want an absolute answer for what absolutes are....

Friday, January 6, 2012

WISHES n blah blah ...................

Hello my precious blogger friends!!
and a very very happy new year to all of you :)
may the year ahead be a blissful one for you and bring a lot of nice surprises for you!!

Do you believe in signs?
ummm.... yeah may be may be not!! actually i wonder whether i should or not!! Should I? what do u say?
I think yes! Its all connected. Every happening will lead to another. Every thing will unfold at their own time but if u believe you can sense the signs.Even the smallest event of your life is directed in a way that if u take the right learning from it, it will lead you to another step up towards the destiny.But the hardest thing is to believe.
Do you really think so? I think believing is the simplest thing to do. Isn't it just similar to ignorance where you shut your eyes and accept anything anyways. And because its the simplest thing to do perhaps that's why it becomes the most difficult to do!! 
To believe is to learn, to grow, to rise.
To believe is to surrender your mind to whim. Its like seeking some guidance from outside always.
To believe is to trust yourself the most and cut the connections with the outsiders dictating right and wrong.
To believe is to shut your eyes 
To believe is to shut your eyes to see.