Monday, July 5, 2010

and the ways parted!

It’s a cold day and ananya has been walking the whole day. All those streets ,all those places which once they had walked together. Its getting dark and ananya is sitting on the bench in the park lonely and quite
I still love this place. Why!! This place was the one where we first exchanged a glance and how this place brought us close together and then this became the place where our ways were parted and our paths diverged never to converge. I wonder whether u ever had even come back here!! And see me , I am sitting here for the entire day just thinking about you and those moments  together.This day! how I wish dis day,I could change the history of this day. U walked away and never looked back. That look of estrangement in our eyes which was there while u left me leaves me all ruptured even today.
The day had a perfect start. We started with the temple. And then the drive in the silent woods with your favorite music playing and I had wished the day had never ended. Here was a different story , a girl was asking the guy for marriage.. Your hoarse voice I liked it so much and that voice became a shrieking cry into my years when u said no to my proposal. And then how I was pleading to you,” U always said that u loved me! Why are u not saying anything ? your silence is killing me..” how could u say that u loved me when you were not ready to get into the marriage ever. And even today I have not been able to figure you out completely. For a moment I thought that u were not serious but the intensity of your voice as it came bewildered me. Those voices still reverberate into my ears from all those times as u said ,”yes, I love u. but I don’t want to marry you, marry anyone. Is marriage the only fate of love? And if I refuse to marry  does dat disapprove the sincerity of ma love for u? “ and u just went silent as if waiting for me to speak . I was so damn shattered. I could not at all understand what was happening. The only thing I could think at that time was why you did this to me.  Why did u ever said that u love me when u did not want to marry me. Why you left me in such a state. And u just left without any words ..not even a word of comfort.. U never showed up again. Never even gave me a chance to talk to you again.
And inspite of that I am helplessly in love with you.  Even today I miss the tenderness of that soft touch with which you used to hold my hand. Your gentle voice with which u called my name. The unique sense of humor u had and how u used to turn the world upside down to make smile. I can’t help loving you. Sometimes I wonder dat did u ever even love me but a part of me knows that ur love was not a showoff, it was true, it was sincere but I think I could not understand you and your strange ideas. You were a different kind of person not like everyone else. Only if u had given me a chance I would have never let this happen. But u just disappeared. I needed time to understand you but perhaps u did not had faith in me. Time is travelling everything is changing but I am not able to change this one thing “my love for you ;eternity may die but my love for u can’t ever”  Hope to see you sometime in life. I will wait for that day ..
The darkness is taking over and today its all clouds that are showing in the sky hiding all the light ..
She’s still watching the lonely lanes and started walking back slowly ….